First Mistake - God creates Lucifer who ends up leading 1/3 of the angelic host into rebellion against him. Instead of dealing with these sinners from the start, he gives them dominion over his Earthly creation. Lucifer-Satan was even able to offer Jesus a bribe in the desert.
Second Mistake - God creates Adam and Eve, who end up getting tricked by Lucifer (his first mistake), into disobeying him regarding a fruit tree full of nutritious knowledge, planted by God for no good purpose if you couldn't eat the God-damned fruit to begin with. Who's the real tempter here, God or Lucifer?
Third Mistake - Not too long after kicking the naughty, naked newlyweds out of Eden, God decides to wipe out humanity in a global flood, except for eight very special people, who end up sinning as soon as they hit dry land - amazing insight on the part of the Creator.
Fourth Mistake - Alas, God is not happy with Noah's descendants getting into the construction business, building the world's tallest skyscraper, so he gets them speaking different languages and disperses them - along with their sinning ways - throughout the world. The Lord's machinations at Babel didn't stop humanity from building sky scrapers but it did allow them to curse God in a variety of foreign languages.
Fifth Mistake - God sends his only son as a human sacrifice so humanity can reconcile with him by the shedding of his son's BLOOD?! Sounds like he's blaming himself over that God-damned fruit tree thing - or is it that Lucifer thing? Of course humanity is still as rotten as ever but now even the worst rotten bastard can settle with God as long as he BELIEVES that Jesus bled to give him a get-out-of-jail-free card. Yikes!
Epilogue: And now for something that gives gloomy Nordic mythology a run for it's money. Jesus must return to Earth a second time in order to initiate another global blood bath and finally destroy God's first mistake - LUCIFER! Forget for one moment that the sciences, factual history and critical reading skills refute a literal interpretation of the Bible. Does the contrived, Pauline Christian narrative of original sin, redemption and salvation make any sense, even metaphorically? In terms of morality and ethics, the storyline lacks both.
